I really enjoyed all your comments about the subject matter of my last post. What can I say, I like a good discussion. I wanted to clarify a few things just to be sure you understand where I am coming from. First off, I completely agree that it's all about how we as mothers explain things to our children. For example, when I was a very small girl my Mom took me to see Cinderella and as we were walking out of the theater she told me that real life wasn't "happily ever after" as portrayed in the movie. She then explained how true happiness was achieved through work and sacrifice. Obviously that made a lasting impression on me if I can still remember it almost 25 years later.
If I came across sounding like I was attacking those of you who have princess stuff at your homes I am sorry because that was not my point at all. I think it is wonderful for little girls to dress up and play pretend. I do not intend to "ban" Disney princess material at my home, I just want to limit its influence, and explain explain explain what I feel are the incorrect messages behind it. Now for another example from my childhood. When I was a girl, my Mom hated Barbies. She didn't relish the idea of her little girl playing with a large chested woman doll. I don't think she liked the message behind the Barbie which seemed to say, Being beautiful is being big boobed, anorexically skinny, having blond hair and blue eyes and boyfriend named Ken. (she never told me this as a child, only as an adult when I asked her why she didn't allow me to play with them.) Therefore Barbies were not played with at my home. I always secretly wanted one but I never got one. So, I'm not real keen on "banning" things as I think it almost has the opposite effect of making your child want what she can't have. (I do have to draw the line at the Bratz dolls-horrible- those will not come in my house)
And finally, perhaps most of you are thinking I am just over analyzing something kind of dumb. Perhaps you are right, but let me explain why. Having a baby girl a little over a year ago has changed my life in a much more profound way than having a boy did. Everything Julia learns about what it means to be a woman will come primarily from me. During my pregnancy I was very anxious and flat out terrified of this awesome responsibility to NOT screw up my child's life and to set a good example of what it means to be a good woman. I began to look at everything differently. Kind of akin to reading the ingredients on the box of cereal you eat everyday , because you are about to feed it to your toddler for the first time. (does that analagy make sense?) I started to look at simple things with more penetrating eyes, knowing that my job would be to explain the barrage of messages that will come her way.
Well, now that you all know what my parenting "thing" is, I'm curious to know what you feel strongly about. Come on, everyone has something. Examples: Maybe you only feed your children organic food because of all the hormones and pesticides in ordinary food. Maybe you won't allow your boys to have any pretend guns in the house because you feel it promotes violence. Maybe your children don't play with any "made in China" toys because you don't want to risk the exposure to lead and other toxins. Please don't be shy. Share...............